I only joined to help out Perry - I, too have run into this madness, and at first I was driven to doing all my work over again via a wizard. But this time, it only took 3 hours to work it out.
When a field doesn't appear in the Field List
Check that title bar of the Field List that appears when you highlight your control. It could be a query, and not a table, and if the query is missing that newly added or modified table field (column), it won't appear in the Field List for that Form.
In my case, I thought the Field List was pulling from the Table of the same name as the Form, but in fact this form was formed from a query made up of controls from several tables, and it was not querying my newly added field to the control source because it didn't know about it.
I added the new field/column to the query, and presto! the field from that table appeared in the Field List for that form control.
How did I finally understand what was wrong? When I selected my control, and clicked on Field List, the Title Bar said Open Issues. The table I thought I was listing fields from is called Issues, not Open Issues. So then I went into my database (a freebie, someone's elses) and looked for something called Open Issues and found a query by that name. And this query was not pulling from my field called Resolution in the Issues table. So I added it.
I know all the Xperts are groaning, but when you're figuring this out by yourself, it's not intuitive.